Just going to begin with a general update. It’s been months since I’ve shared anything. If I’m going to be honest, things got tough. Mentally, postpartum is tough. And I feel like it’s often considered taboo to talk about depression, anxiety because it’s some sort of “label”. And then women suffer alone and it shouldn’t be that way. It seems the new norm is being given an anti anxiety medication and going on your way. Which hey, if that’s what you need, do it. But some people don’t want the medication and I was one of those people.
I had my hormones checked back in the fall of 2023. High estrogen and low progesterone. Since then I have been taking care of both of those issues.
Let’s fast forward to the spring of 2024. Nothing feels good to me; workouts, nutrition sucks, just feeling like my identity is gone. The things that once made me happy and drove me now feel daunting. Friendships felt like they had vanished. I had a select few people that I would talk to about how I felt. I decided it was best to step away from my online businesses. If I wasn’t giving myself the best attention, how could I help other women? But then I felt like I was letting everyone down. I had a friend tell me, “ Lindsey, it’s okay if you’re not in your winning season right now.” and as hard as that was to hear, i needed it. I knew that in some way I was going to have to do less in order to heal.
So what did I do? Well, I did the bare minimum. Obviously I would be sure my kids stayed alive and healthy. But I would work in the mornings ( we own a cleaning business) and then I would hang out with my kids; play, organize, etc or whatever needed done that day. I created a little routine for us; cleaning our home, laundry, dinner, etc. and day by day I felt like I was doing better.
I know most moms will understand when I say this; you just wake up one morning and the postpartum fog is gone. I know it’s different for everyone, but almost every other mom I’ve spoken to says the same thing.
So what are we doing now? Well, I am still not coaching fitness, but I believe I am here to educate something. Maybe it’s motherhood. Which has not been something that has come easily, not just because of postpartum depression/ anxiety. Perhaps I’ll share that in a different blog post. I love sharing things that help people or experiences that people can relate to. My goal is to share the things that have helped me gain confidence as a mother, what’s brought me peace that since life has changed as someone who was goal driven, how I created my identity again, and just the realistic fun stuff.
